Up and ready to start the day. I just love Fridays. Now more than ever since Roger has been lucky enough to get Friday’s and Sunday’s off. Having one day of my weekend to spend with the love of my life is completely amazing. He is so funny. This morning he wakes me up and tells me it’s 6:20 and I am late. He does this with the utmost gentleness. I get up all freaked thinking I am late, run down stairs, hop in the shower, and when I get out and look at the clock it’s only 5:20 hahaha. I must have messed up my alarm clock while dusting last night. I love the extra time.
Yesterday’s appraisal went well from what I have been told. We’re hoping to get the call from the bank today that it came in high enough to cover the loan so we can move in over the weekend. However, I am cool if we have to wait until next week. Whatever happens is good with me. I am not forcing anything. I am just riding the wave, or going with the flow (if you will).
Something Joel Osteen keeps coming to mind. God’s plans for your life is bigger than anything you could come up with on your own. Us getting this house could not have been possible without God’s hand. He lined up just the right people, just the right situation, at just the right time.
Well, there is literally three days left in this month. I can’t help but wonder when we’re going to be moving into the new place. I would really love to be able to get out of here without putting out another $650 in rent. However, I am well aware that this is totally out of my hands. I know that this is going to happen when it is supposed to happen. I have to trust that God will make it happen when it is perfect for us.
Today is the appraisal. If it goes well we’ll be able to move in over the weekend, which would be the best, easiest way for us. I guess I’ll just leave that one out there. LOL..
Off to work. Have a blessed day.
So this morning while having my coffee and browsing face book, I came across a status of an acquaintance. I think we may have met twice while Roger was playing out regularly. I feel compelled to respond to her status. Even though I really don’t know her well enough to say anything at all. All I want to tell her is it’s ok if you made a mistake. We all make them. God loves us, imperfections and all. You are never alone. There is a higher being there to guide your every step, if we allow it. We may get off track but as long as we life and learn we’ll get back on track I am not an overly religious person. I consider myself more spiritual than I do religious. However, I do believe there is a reason we are all here.
Her post: another rough night.. why can’t I just put this behind me it’s been 7 months and I still cry myself to sleep.. I wish I could just go back to that horrible day, when I lost half of my soul, most of my friends, and all of my dignity.. I want to stand up for myself, but I am just not strong enough.
That post tugs at my heart. I wish her to know that her life matters. She matters. And She IS strong enough. Stand up, shake it off, and make today matter.
What can I say? I am not a spiritual leader. But if she would Dvr Joel Osteen and watch, she would find that there IS hope and it is within us all. You cannot see opportunity if you are so wound up, focusing on the past or stressing over the future. I will never forget the day my mother called me and demanded that I watch and call her when it was done. I was in a deep dark depression. I spent most of my time in bed with the most horrible thought about my life, but when it was over I felt like the life was breathed back into me. He saved me from myself at a point in my life.
Here I sit, enjoying my coffee, trying to organize my list of things I want to accomplish today. We are getting ready to move into our new home. A funny story about that. About eight months ago I started a dream board, and on that dream board I put a picture of a little red house with a For Sale sign in front of it. I don’t know why I put it on there but I did. And it is pretty close to what the house looks like that we are actually buying. Pretty amazing!!
So I figure today I’ll organize my bedroom and get it ready to go. I am very lucky in that I have strong able-bodied boys that will move all of my stuff. They are very good at it. The last time we moved I went to work living in one place and went home to my new place all set up. It was amazing. I am excited for that day.
Today was a pretty rocken day. Work was so chill I got to leave at 2pm. Lucky me. I came home and took a nap that left me feeling like I was on cloud nine. When I got up Rog made is world famous buffalo wings (baked not fried). We ate and now are having a couple of drinks. Planning on a visit with some old friends then out to hear some musician friends of Roger’s.
So we ended up getting the house that we were looking at. I knew that it would work out if it was suppose to be. Of coarse none of this would be possible without the help of my mother. It’s completely amazing what she has done for my family. Not to mention everything she has done for everyone around her. She it truly an angel on earth.
I am thinking we will probably start to move in the middle of October. It’s a strange thing but even when I said we were not going to get the house I still had the feeling we would be living there at Christmas. Things are looking up. All the boys have jobs, and are working a lot.
Now if I could only get the stress at work to calm down. I think I am going to pull a couple twelve hour days this week to try and set myself up for less stressful days. I just need to iron out the pricing issues and I will be able to move on. Whewwww! I’m going to just keep on, keeping on.
When I watch my shows Big Brother and Survivor and even Bachelor Pad I have to ask myself why is it that people who are truly evil to the core always come out the winner? If people who are lyres and cheaters are not supposed to prevail, why do they in this situation. Why do they walk away with a half a million dollars? Even those who tell how Godly they are and then back stab and lie, win the money. There are times when I am watching my shows that I question being a good person. I mean, I know people in real life who seem to come out on top by stepping on others to push themselves forward and it works. Does this mean that if I continue to be a kind and caring person that I will have less than those who are not?
I can say this about myself, personally. I would rather have less and live my life without guilt. I literally know people that can back stab, lie, cheat, steal and walk away without giving it another thought. And then there is me. I may accidentally hurt a persons feelings and beat myself up over it. Does this mean that if you don’t believe in Karma you wont experience it? I have to believe that in the end, being good will matter.
I am thinking that starting tomorrow I am going to take a break from Face Book. I feel like a lot of times just getting on there leaves me feeling like shit. I have people on my page that I don’t want to see. People that I have chosen to no longer be friends with. However, I feel like I cannot just delete them because that would be rude. There are so many people that are just not a good fit for my life anymore. But, at the same time, I feel sad that they are no longer in my life. Does that make sense? I would just delete my page all together, however, I have a lot of family on there I would never get to talk to if I didn’t have my account. It’s a bit of a double edge sword.
I cannot even believe it is Thursday already. This week has flown by. We finally got our new fridge. It’s huge. We love it. Our last fridge was so old. It had the freezer with the plastic door inside of the fridge area.
We went to the bank to talk about buying that house yesterday. It was so completely intense and stressful. I don’t think that is going to happen. The closing costs were more than we could come up with. It’s ok. We are happy right where we are. I’m glad we did it and got it over with. I did my part and tried. However, I don’t think I will be putting myself through that again.
It’s funny because even though buying this house looks grim I feel completely blessed. It is a lot easier to take disappointment when you carry the belief that everything will happen the way it should. If it is not right, it is not right. I truly believe that God has got my back, and that as long as I go with the flow my life will revolve exactly as it should.
Thank you God for being there for me, and my family. I truly believe that because of you I am living the dream.