All posts for the month October, 2014

This Serves My Soul

Published October 30, 2014 by Stuff My Brain Thinks

This morning I thought I would blog my intentions.  It’s Thursday!  Another one of my seven favorite days of the week.

My overall intentions for my life as of today October 30, 2014 are;

To get up at four in the morning.  I simply love it.  I love the peace, joy and content feelings this time of day gives me.  I love the bliss I feel while puttering around my house in the early morning hours, enjoying my coffee, meditation, dancing and blogging/journal writing.  This serves my soul.

To be energetic.  Having energy fuels productivity and being productive gives me a feeling of success which, in turn, makes me feel alive.  This serves my soul.

To make responsible choices.  Making responsible choices gives me the feeling of empowerment.  This serves my soul.

To be kind.  Kindness makes my heart expand.  Every kind word or gesture expands my heart more and more with love.  No act of kindness is to small.  This serves my soul.

These are simple soul serving intentions.  As long as these intentions are in place all of the secondary things in life will line up for me.  I have faith in God and the universe that the path They have laid out for me is going to be truly amazing, better than anything I could ever hope for myself.

Be Blessed.



Spirituality to Me

Published October 28, 2014 by Stuff My Brain Thinks

Every once in a while I like to check in with myself.  I like to ask myself a meaningful question and then journal about it.  This morning’s question is, what is spirituality to me?

Spirituality to me is self-awareness.  It is getting up close and personal with myself.  It is recognizing feelings and behaviors and digging deep to find the meaning behind them.  It’s about learning why I make the choices that I do.  Why I repeat certain behaviors.  It’s about exploring my feelings.  It’s basically making me, my number one project.

Spirituality is about forgiveness.  Forgiveness of others that I perceived to have hurt me and forgiveness for myself.  Forgiveness is a freeing and powerful thing.  To hold onto grudges and judgements only creates tension and stress on the inside.  It draws to you more tension and stress.  Forgiveness is easy with compassion.

Spirituality is about compassion.  In order to forgive myself and other’s I had to find compassion for both them and myself.  I had to understand that challenges are part of the human experience and we all make mistakes.

Spirituality is about living consciously.  Living in the present moment.  It’s about really being with what I’m doing.  Instead of thinking of the future or the past while, for instance, I like to be totally with washing my dishes or with the tasks at my job, for example.  Doing this creates such a state of peace.

Spirituality is about loving.  Walking around with a loving heart.  Love everyone and everything.  Some people may not be what I would consider a “like-minded” person with me but I love them for their individuality.  There are people in my life that don’t always rub me the right way, but when looking deep I can see their goodness.

Spirituality is about connection.  We are connected to everything.  Every one and Every thing.  If there is something about someone I don’t like, I know that whatever it is that irritates me about that person, is inside of me.  This equally true for things I love about people.  We are all connected.  Therefore, how can I dislike someone who has the same quality as me?  To dislike another or hurt another is to dislike or hurt myself.

Spirituality is knowing that I am everything and no thing at the same time.  I am a balance between my human side and my being side.  As I grow spiritually that balance becomes more and more integrated.  Over time I hope for my human side to act in accordance with my being side, allowing my personality to become in line with my soul.  This, to me, would be where ultimate inner peace resides.  It is where bliss and joy reside, as well.

Spirituality is about making responsible choices.  I still struggle with this one, but I know that every time I succumb to temptation there is a lesson to be learned.  I know that I have a lot to learn.  However I am certain that I will  make responsible choices, not only me but for the universe and all things in it.  This in my opinion is the way to peace and Light.

Spirituality is about embracing the uncertainty of life.  It is about going with the flow.  It is about allowing things to happen instead of forcing them to happen.  It is about being aware of myself enough to head the messages of the universe, God, and my intuition.

Spirituality is about clarity.  It’s about living my life with a clear mind.  It’s about removing thoughts that are not 100% supportive of my life.

Spirituality is about evolving.  In order for me to evolve I must begin to make more responsible choices.  A statement from the book Seat of the Soul;  You can either make choices that support the soul or the personality.  To support the soul is to choose Light and wisdom, to choose the personality is to choose doubt and fear.  I have no intention on living my life in doubt and fear, therefore, I am on a journey to make more soulful choices.

Spirituality is a journey without end.  It is an amazing, exhilarating journey.  I have laughed, I have cried, I have gotten angry all in the name of self-awareness.  All in the name of become a better me.  All in the name of love.



Rebirth Date: November 19th

Published October 25, 2014 by Stuff My Brain Thinks

I finally got my surgery date, it is the 19th of November.  I simply cannot wait to get this under way.  I start my shakes/liquid pre-op diet on the 10th.  This may sound strange to some, but I am looking forward to beginning the pre-operative stage of my journey.

My intentions throughout this whole ordeal is to stick to the doctors orders 100%.  I am going to give this my all and when I am at a comfortable weight I am going to get involved in some 5k’s and either start a dance class or join one.

I want to be active, healthy and maintain a healthy weight for the rest of my life.  I do not intend on blowing this gift.  I am ready to get healthy and stay that way.  🙂

With Love and Light


From The Seat of the Soul

Published October 21, 2014 by Stuff My Brain Thinks

This week I am reading the 25th Anniversary edition of The Seat of the Soul by Gary Zucav.  I am about a quarter of the way through the book and I have to say, Wow.  This could not have come at a better time for me.  Being that I believe everything happens for a reason, I am not surprised that it did come.  That been said, I have noticed lately that my personality really wants to cry and throw a fit because I have not gotten the approval to get weight-loss surgery.  I can clearly observe the “why me’s” and the pissing and moaning because this didn’t go my way.

sots-25th-ad-homepage-availableThe observer of this nonsense is my soul.  It is in my soul that I believe everything happens for a reason and that we are all on our own path that can and will be guided through messages from the universe, God, and our intuition, if we allow it.  I believe that we have many guiding forces behind us that will lead us to our best selves listen and follow.  As human beings we have free will to make our choices.  We will either choose doubt and fear or Light and wisdom.

Gary explains that decisions that we make will either support the soul or the personality.  The personality is where doubt and fear reside and the soul is, of course, is where Light and wisdom reside.  This made a whole lot of sense to me since a lot of my bad decisions have to do with food choices.  I am an emotional eater, therefore I am 100% choosing doubt and fear.  I am going to be on the look out for this and work to make my choices in support of my soul.

Thankfully I meditate and have made the conscious decision to live a fully conscious life these choices and decisions will be made with much more ease.  I am not praying to get approval any longer.  I am praying for the right out come.  Whatever that is I will accept it knowing that it is the right thing for me.  I will not force or even speak of it.  I am ready to surrender this one to God and move forward.  I have put my personality on notice, the whining, pissing and moaning is over.  I have joyous life to live.   🙂

With love and Light




It is What It is

Published October 15, 2014 by Stuff My Brain Thinks

It seems the bariatric center that I am working with for weight-loss surgery didn’t submit my packet to the insurance company correctly.  My first reaction was that I was hurt.  I mean I have spent the last week in limbo waiting to hear from the insurance company with an APPROVAL, instead I got this letter that stated that none of my information was submitted.

I’m not going to lie and say that I am still not a little heart-broken.  But, I know that there is a lesson in this.  Every situation, good and bad, holds a lesson.  So, what is it?  Is it one of patience?  Because I have come a long way in the patience department.  Could I come a little further?  Sure…  Who couldn’t.

I swore to myself before starting this journey for weight-loss surgery that I would not force it to happen.  That if it was supposed to happen it would do so effortlessly.  Therefore, I cannot jump through hoops to get this done.  It has to be 100% right, in order for me to proceed.  Erich Fried - What it is

So, here I am, at an impasse.  The very minute I got the letter I called the insurance company to be sure they are still missing the information and then when they were I called the doctor’s office to inform them and fax the letter over.  Although doing those three things was not at all difficult I am done.

In order to practice my trust in God, I have to let this one go.  It either is going to happen, or it isn’t.  Can I live the rest of my life the way that I am?  Sure…  I can do that.  I have done it for forty-six years, I can do it and be happy because when all is said and done, I love me just the way I am.  I am a pretty healthy girl, I know what to eat and what not to eat, so if I had to I could probably at least maintain where I am now and live a happy, full life.

Anyway, today’s motto is…….  it is what it is!

As always love and blessings


Living Fully and Consciously with Affirmations

Published October 12, 2014 by Stuff My Brain Thinks

So here I sit.  Sunday morning!  It’s so peaceful.  After meditating this morning I found myself making an affirmation vision board.  It’s a bit different from the other vision boards in my house.  This one is full of affirmations that I use pretty much every day.  I swear by them.  Earlier this year when I first started using affirmations, I received a pretty nice size raise, and got a new car that I wasn’t even looking for among so many other things.

IMG_1460It seems that since starting the use of affirmations my life has been moving right along evolving from one miraculous moment to the next.  Now that is not to say I haven’t had periods of challenging situations and sadness because to say that would simply be abnormal.

I have come to understand that we need the suffering that the human experience provides in order to grow and move toward our purpose in life.  In fact it is those that suffer the most that awaken sooner than later.

I suffered for most of my life, but looking back I can see that all of that suffering was necessary for me to find a more peaceful existence.  That suffering is what created a surrender to life’s uncertainties that I so desperately needed.  The simple act of surrender is what created that peace for me.  Now and again I find myself so submerged in life that I miss the bliss of living consciously.  Good news I am able to make the shift in a much swifter manner these days.

Practice, practice, practice!!!  

I have resigned myself as a spiritual thinker.  For a long time I didn’t know what I was.  I stumbled on my words when trying to explain that I am a student of many spiritual thinkers and leaders.  I am on a journey to know me inside and out.  I am on a spiritual quest of self-awareness.  I want to know why I do the things I do.  I want to know what I am thinking and whether or not those thoughts are serving me to a better life.

I have been on this path for several years now and it has been one amazing lesson after the next.  It amazes me just how exciting every day life can be when you wake up and live it.

I am really just rambling this morning.  Lately, I have been using this beautiful book my sister got me to journal but this morning I felt the need to blog.

Anyway, since I have taken the last sip of my coffee I suppose I should get off here and get some things done.

As always, with love


Come on Next Chapter, Open Up for Me…

Published October 8, 2014 by Stuff My Brain Thinks

I woke this morning with a grateful heart.  I am not sure why but I will take it.  Yesterday, I was easily irritated.  By the end of the day I was annoyed with everything and everyone.  So, to wake up this morning feeling the complete opposite is kind of interesting.  I actually giggled a little at the fact that my mind was being riddled with joy and loving thoughts for everything and everyone upon waking.chapel05

I’m not complaining by any means.  I am going to revel in it and stay conscious so I can maintain it.  I am in the waiting stage to find out if I am going to get an approval for the RNY.  These few days have been the hardest, I think.  I have to keep reminding myself that when the time is right I will get my answer, and that works a lot of the time but there are times when I have allowed my egoic mind to take over and cause me to become anxious, and do something I find completely worthless, worry.

Thank goodness I am able to make the shift pretty easily, once I realize I am blocked.  I mean a day is better than a month, right?  Sometimes realizing I’m blocked takes some time.  I can only imagine that the more conscious I become the easier it will be to recognize when I am unconscious.  I heard Oprah explain that those that live unconsciously are the walking dead.

imagesWhat an interesting way to put it.  I couldn’t agree more.  If I am not living in the present, I am not living.  If I am not living in the present, I am living in the anxiety of the future or the stress of the past.  Since life only exist in the now, that is where I choose to live.  I intend to continue to meditate and hone my self-awareness to the point that I will know the minute I become blocked, and am able to make the shift and become contented and at peace once again.

Today is the third day that the insurance has been reviewing my surgery packet so I am getting close.  Thankfully, I have amazing insurance and they promised to have the answer within three days.  Woot Woot!  Come on next chapter, open up for me.  I am ready!!

My question to the universe today is; What do I have to do to get a surgery date?

A Little Bit of This a Little Bit of That

Published October 5, 2014 by Stuff My Brain Thinks

Tomorrow I have my nutritional review class at the bariatric center in Saranac.  I have completed all the test and jumped through all of the hoops to have this surgery done.  Now, I am waiting for approval from my insurance company.  I am very fortunate to have really good insurance, and I don’t foresee any issues or have any doubts that I will be approved but the wait is still hard.  I keep telling myself that it cannot happen until the precise time it is supposed to happen. It’s kind of like being pregnant, only it’s the birth of a new chapter in my life.

On a another note, the other day I downloaded the HAYHOUSE app on my phone.  It is free and offers many great classes on spiritual growth and manifesting a positive, happy life.  I urge anyone who is reading this to check it out.  I watched the streaming class with Louise Hay and Cheryl Richardson.  It was called, You Can Create An Exceptional Life.

While watching they offered an exercise to try to prove that what we think is what we get.  This exercise is simple, first picture something in your mind, for example, I pictured a stack of money, and then simply let it go.  Picture it again a few seconds later and then again after that.  Each time seeing it in your mind and then letting it go.  After that go about your day and pay attention to see how long it takes the universe to show you exactly what you had pictured.

I did this experiment that night while lying in bed watching TV.  I pictured a stack of money three times just as they instructed.  Not a minute later a commercial came on for a food sealer that showed a sealed stack of money.  I was amazed.  I realized more than ever that I had to be sure to think the best quality thoughts so I can have the best quality life.screen568x568

Louise and Cheryl also talked a little bit about asking and receiving what it is you want for your life.  They stated to ask out loud what it is you want and the universe will meet you where ever you are to help you achieve it.  I thought ok, I can do that, that’s easy so I asked out loud; how can I lose two and a half pounds by Monday morning (my next appointment at the bariatric center).  I simply asked it and went about my business.

I noticed throughout the day I chose foods higher in protein, I drank a lot of water and did some dancing.  All of this happened without any effort from me, meaning I didn’t have to make myself do any of it.  The weekends are the hardest times for me.  I tend to be unproductive and over eat, so I am feeling pretty good about this.  Anyway this morning I woke up having lost a pound and a half.  Can I get a hell yea?  I only have one more pound to go.

I bet you can guess what I did this morning, I got up, meditated and asked the question out loud; What do I have to do to lose one pound by tomorrow morning?  Being that it’s Sunday I am feeling pretty confident that this is going to happen.

Today is the day I prepare for the upcoming week.  I cook meals and prepackage them into individual containers for lunches and dinners.  I get my clothes out and I clean the house.  I am 100% certain that when I wake up tomorrow I will be the exact weight I need to be to appease the center.

The scale and I have become friendly these past couple of months, as I have had to watch my weight very closely during this process.  I had to be sure not to gain and if I did lose it could only be a few pounds so as to keep me with in the guide lines to be approved for surgery.  It’s been a learning experience.  One that I have fully enjoyed.  Hopefully this week will be my week and I will get the approval notice.

I ask the out loud; What do I have to do to get approved for surgery this week? 

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