I woke this morning with a grateful heart. I am not sure why but I will take it. Yesterday, I was easily irritated. By the end of the day I was annoyed with everything and everyone. So, to wake up this morning feeling the complete opposite is kind of interesting. I actually giggled a little at the fact that my mind was being riddled with joy and loving thoughts for everything and everyone upon waking.
I’m not complaining by any means. I am going to revel in it and stay conscious so I can maintain it. I am in the waiting stage to find out if I am going to get an approval for the RNY. These few days have been the hardest, I think. I have to keep reminding myself that when the time is right I will get my answer, and that works a lot of the time but there are times when I have allowed my egoic mind to take over and cause me to become anxious, and do something I find completely worthless, worry.
Thank goodness I am able to make the shift pretty easily, once I realize I am blocked. I mean a day is better than a month, right? Sometimes realizing I’m blocked takes some time. I can only imagine that the more conscious I become the easier it will be to recognize when I am unconscious. I heard Oprah explain that those that live unconsciously are the walking dead.
What an interesting way to put it. I couldn’t agree more. If I am not living in the present, I am not living. If I am not living in the present, I am living in the anxiety of the future or the stress of the past. Since life only exist in the now, that is where I choose to live. I intend to continue to meditate and hone my self-awareness to the point that I will know the minute I become blocked, and am able to make the shift and become contented and at peace once again.
Today is the third day that the insurance has been reviewing my surgery packet so I am getting close. Thankfully, I have amazing insurance and they promised to have the answer within three days. Woot Woot! Come on next chapter, open up for me. I am ready!!
My question to the universe today is; What do I have to do to get a surgery date?